![]() I honest to god can not believe I have been here 2 weeks. I left my house 2 whole weeks ago tonight, on a mare of a journey, thinking I had all the time in the world before it had to be repeated. Alas, all the time in the world arrived far too quickly! I have not overdone it whilst here. I have not drank myself into oblivion much to my Mothers relief, yet I have not been allowed to stay in bed for the duration of the day either. Humph! I have been too hot, too cold and just right. I have smoked less, drank less yet eaten more. I have spent up, not bought enough, yet am over weight with luggage. What is the world coming to? It is safe to say that I am going to have to go on one serious diet when I finally arrive home. Dont get me wrong, I have tried my hardest to not over eat, stuff my face, and in general, not to make too much of a pig out of myself. I have failed on all 3 counts. Bang goes the outfit I was going to wear for Halloween dam it! No such thing as a sexy cat with a stomach hanging out all over the place. But have I had a good time filling my face with crap? Hell yeah! I have eaten pizza and pasta and more pizza and British bread like it has been going out of fashion. Oh dear lord how I miss British bread back in Marmaris. If they could just get one thing right, British bread should be it. I would ask for world peace, however there is more chance of the British bread so I have to go with the statistics. Spain is a grand old place in the summer. I did not visit in the summer though did I. None the less, I have had fun and some memorable experiences... There have been arguments... When we were in Murcia and trying to locate Primark I could have killed myself. My Dad does not follow directions from the Sat Nav, nor the road signs, nor me when I could see Primark plain as day in the distance. This resulted in me having a hissy fit and my Dad almost turning around and heading home. Could you imagine if I had come all this way and not had my Primark fix? There would have been a death in the family... There have also been laughs... My Dad decided that he was going to have 'patiently waiting' inscribed on his tomb stone after waiting an eternity for me and the Mother to get ready for dinners out. One night in particular was on his birthday wouldn't you know it. And to make matters worse, whilst walking through Calpe heading for the restaurant, both of my Dad's shoes just fell to pieces. I mean, its just not normal I tell you! One shoe fair enough, but both? For the love of god! Another laugh we had was tonight over dinner watching my Mum trying to do an impression of a French person. Needless to say a South African trying to impersonate any other country is just ridiculous, and this was no different. If only I had recorded it on my camera... I have not missed home as much as I thought I would. Usually when I come to Spain I really really miss home. This time I think I needed to get the hell out of Marmaris before I drove myself stir crazy. I have missed the dog though. I think I must have irritated my fairy dog sitter Kelsey the minglet to death with my every day messages about what the dog was doing and if he had taken his pills, etc. Bless her, she even took photos of him and posted them to facebook just so I could see that he hadnt keeled over. :) Aside from missing the dog, I have had fun to be sure. What with my Dad's comments of telling my Mum to get her head out of the doughnut bag, my Mums efforts to force feed me, and my full on hissy fits, Spain has been an absolute trip that is coming to a close for this year. I wonder how long it will take me to get back next time? Not too long if Primark has anything to do with it. I can feel a 'Murcia Recruitment' coming along... And if I thought I was in for a quiet time when I get home, I would be sadly mistaken. Firstly, I have a lot of catching up to do on the work front. Secondly, my friend Lotfi is leaving on Monday heading back to Tunisia. We are squeezing in one last X Factor night this Saturday, probably heading down to Bar Street after, with the night ending possibly with me horribly drunk slavering on my own shoulder. I dont intend the night to end in such a manor, but dont forget dear readers, I have been off the pop for 2 whole weeks so I believe that it will hit me hard. And then off course comes Halloween on Monday. What would Halloween be if I didnt dress myself up in my old Gothic attire and have a few drinks to boot? And I am as sure as sure can be there will be more randomness to add to the pit of festivities just for the sake of it. Well, your only a 31 year old socialite once after all... So, it is back to normality again soon. However, to get back to said normality I have to start my mare of a journey in the morning beginning with a 2 hour drive to Valencia airport, a 4 hour flight to Istanbul, a 5 hour wait at Istanbul airport for my connecting flight, a 1.5 hour flight to Dalaman and then finally, a 1.5 hour drive back home, rounding up my fairy dog sitter Kelsey the minglet and dropping her off. Jesus. I guess you will hear from me once again next year sometime. P.S: The dentist would rather not be known as the dentist anymore and would like to be rebranded as: 'The Dude'. Am I going to humor him? I doubt it very much.
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![]() Day 4 already? Un-frikkin' believable! Time flies when your having fun and that doesnt matter what country that you happen to be in, as when I am at home in Marmaris, time flies just the same... I have been chilling out and not doing to much since recovering from the journey, but just enough to keep me occupied for the time being. I hadnt actually realized how much of a chill out I needed until I decided to actually chill out. Funny how we continue on auto pilot for so long without knowing that the body is craving a break isnt it? Anyway I have been doing the tourist thing and have managed to make it into Calpe and Moraira a couple of times now and even made it down to the beach. I have not managed to sun bathe, but hey, when do I ever do that in Marmaris? Things seem to be at somewhat of a slower pace here than they are at home. Even though its not my first time visiting, I was still shocked to find that shops (including supermarkets) close from a Saturday afternoon right through to a Monday morning, during the week everyone has a siesta meaning that no shop in any town is open, and by the time I get up I have to wait another few hours before I can actually go shopping. I find this is very odd to say the least! I have however managed to keep to my usual routine of watching the X Factor on Saturday and Sunday night whilst here. Its a good thing that my Mum likes watching it too as I could have really cramped their usual Saturday night out on the town style... Ahh well, only child and all that :) Today I was supposed to set aside time to work on my book. Have I done any work on my book? No. But there is a reason. We went into town this morning (as my Mum dragged me out of my pit at 9.30am), went clothes shopping, came home and had lunch, then just as we were going to go off in a different direction to Calpe to partake in more shopping, we were headed off by the neighbors for a cuppa and cakes. Then we decided upon the Chinese. I found a bit of a fan in the Chinese in the form of the waitress. Yep, you heard me right, the waitress. Even with the big spot on my nose, she seemed to be overly attentive towards me. This could be due to being Chinese, or, due to the fact that me being 31, would have been the youngest person ever to be seen in town. Yes its safe to say, this area when coming into the winter is not for the young. Not that I am here to party. Not at all in fact. Even if my friends still lived in the area, I may have had one night out on the town before the blue rinse brigade really took over. Alas, I am here to visit the parents and to chill the hell out. Which is so far exactly what I have done. We are taking a holiday within this holiday on Thursday and heading on down to Murcia overnight. Why? Primark is there, thats why. I have not been back to the UK for over a year and I generally go into spasms and palpitations if I havent had a Primark fix in 6 months, and even though the one we are heading to is minute, I just dont care as I happen to not be in the UK (bonus) and will still head back to Turkey with having somewhat of a Primark fix. Go Spain! Kelsey my fairy dog sitter has been giving me regular updates on the Guc. I think she was surprised to find that he snores like a human and farts like one too. At least the dog seems to be having fun :) I have been informed that it is freezing cold now in Marmaris. To be honest, I am a bit jealous as even though it started off grey here on Friday, it certainly isnt any more! Its sodding well shorts and T.Shirt weather wouldnt you know it! Come on universe, give this sun stressed gal a break and cloud over just for one sodding afternoon! For once I have been rather snap happy with my camera, although I havent quite figured out how to actually get the correct date on the dam thing even though I have had the camera in my possession for 6 years. At the moment it is sitting on 2015. No matter what I do, it just wont change from that date, so I have given up. Other than that, I have not had much of a drink other than the odd Beer and G n T over our BBQ on Sunday afternoon. This is my detox time. It wont happen again for another 3.5 years, so I may as well make the most of it now. Its odd when you have your parents casting knowing looks and the 'one more nail in the coffin' remarks every time I announce that I am going outside for a fag that makes me want to smoke more. Or when they tell me that I drink far too much when I am at home, it makes me want to open a bottle of vodka and polish the bugger off. Parents eh, dont they know that if they only tried a bit of reverse psychology on me that it would work like a charm? Ahh well, its nearly time for 'Made in Chelsea',another TV routine that I get to keep whilst here. Yes dear 5 readers, Spain is not too bad at all when visiting the parents... :) ![]() I have arrived! Yes I am safe and sound in Spain, however the journey was a different story all together. I must point out that it may not have been one of my wisest ideas going out for dinner and drinks with the Joanne the minger, then onto more drinks with the dentist the day before travelling, but, it has taught me a lesson. A lesson that will be followed through in the future? Who knows but its fair to say that when I left the house on Thursday night at 12.30am, I really was not prepared for the 16 hour journey ahead of me. Seriously. Getting to Dalaman was easy enough. The flight to Istanbul was also plain sailing. What was not so much plain sailing (more tearing my hair out in sheer tiredness and frustration) was the 4 hours waiting for my connecting flight at Istanbul airport. Yes that really did test me. There was no where to park my tired butt and I really was in no mood to go duty free shopping, so nothing else for it but to sit on the damn floor. Not that bad I know, but just 1 blink turned into 40 winks. When I woke up, rubbed my eyes and looked at my watch, panic coursed through my veins. I had 10 mins to make it to my boarding gate before it closed. Did I have any idea where the hell I was going? Off course not. I can honestly say, the parents would have never forgiven me if I had not made that flight. I may have been disowned once and for all. But, I found my way running like a banshee on steroids, possibly knocking into a few people along the way. As you can see though, I made it and I am here, tiredness and all, finally getting into the parents house at 3.30pm today. On the up side, the weather is grey. I say upside as I am now so sick of the hot sunny days that Marmaris brings that I thankfully welcome this greyness with open arms. Good lord I am the voice of misery this evening arnt I? I put that down to missing the dog already. He was not a happy piglet when I left last night, let me tell you! But, as I have already been informed by my fairy dog sitter Kelsey the minglet, Gucci is, as predicted, getting spoilt rotten! I think I have gone well and truly past the vile stage of tiredness and into the hallucination stage now, so let me take this opportunity to let you know that if you dont hear from me for a while, the G and T in my hand may have something to do with the severe crash that I feel is soon to be upon me... Yes, its a bugger of a journey its true, but when adding a hangover and sleep deprivation into the equation, the 'bugger' turn's into much worse. Ahh well, I guess I have got 2 weeks to get over it before I have to do it all over again. Bring on the 14 hours sleep I am about to fall into. And with that, I bid you goodnight. XOXO ![]() I have finally blogged! I know, I know, I am about a week late with my usual update, however I have been a busy little socialite of late! Anyway, it is finally here and now that it is here, Im not too sure where to start...? The beginning is always a good bet, so lets start there... I believe that the last post ended with the fool that I am wowling on about the dentist. Well, there in lies a story all on its own. I seem to have found myself hooking back up with him since, and it is fair to say, I have seen him quite a bit. There have been drinks out, drinks in and I have even managed to cook him dinner. He aint dead yet, Bonus! So I guess you can say that after 2 weeks was most definitely not enough to pass judgement on someone. What the hell was I thinking in the first place? Stupid asse! Yes he probably still wants to be single, but I find myself having a good time at doing the same thing! Anyway, amongst one of the nights out in Bar St with the Dentist, a rather 'old' friend of his asked me for my number and invited me to a party. Cant say I thought much about this until he called me up out of the blue on Monday afternoon to invite me to said house party in November. Got in early with his invitation eh!? The dentist thought that this was frikkin hilarious that the old friend of his was hitting on me. I found it quite odd to say the least as being 31 does not mean that I have been left on the shelf, just waiting for a 65 year old man to come along and think that I would fancy him. Dont get me wrong here, this fella is not horrific for his age, he is fairing well, but for the love of god, my Dad is only a few years older than him. Anyway, I think he was just being friendly asking for my number in a bar and inviting me to a party - 2ce. What on earth would a man of 65 want with a 31 year old anyway? Urm, possibly best not to answer that one! Other than that, the Yanki showed up last week. He has bought himself a new motorbike and wanted to drive it here, there and just about everywhere. So I got taken for a ride. But just a ride on the bike before awkward questions start arriving :) It wasnt weird to see him, in fact it was normal. He's OK really, as OK as a Yanki is going to get anyway. I have not seen Joanne the minger for 2 weeks now and I am starting to get withdrawal symptoms. She has been awfully busy with her new job but I am missing my minger terribly as I have such an awful amount of updates for her and they can not be told to anyone other than of higher ranking minger status.. But I get it, new jobs take up loads of time, however I am sodding off to Spain on Thursday and I have the feeling that I still wont see her before I leave! Awful.com I am going to add in here that I have been stupendously busy in this period, what with going out for drinks with the dentist, meetings for work, and having to attempt to pack for Spain, so I havent had that much time either! I have however been making time to do the X Factor. Such a saddo I know, but me and my pal Lotfi have been having the best weekends doing the X Factor, why would I want to stop? 'Doing the X Factor' involves going for dinner, drinking rather a lot, gossiping, drinking some more, watching the X Factor then finally heading down to bar street to end the night with more drink. The only problem that I have encountered with this is that I have been having vodka night on the Fridays before the X Factor with my friend Korhan and the vodka nights have seriously buggered it up for me when it comes to getting intoxicated and silly for the Saturday. Well, its either the vodka nights before hand or the dinners that have been eaten whilst watching the X Factor. I have never been able to eat and then proceed to drink easily. I think I should cut out the dinners really and then Im sure I would be in a more festive mood when it comes to hitting bar street. All said and done, I have obviously enjoyed myself. It is a rather odd feeling knowing that when I get back from Spain, half my friends will have gone to wherever they are going for the winter and the other half will possibly be pissed as its the start of the winter. I am happy to say that I will easily fall into the 2d category quite easily when I return home. Ahh home. Another issue. I still have not found anywhere quite to my liking. I know I am fussy, not as fussy as some I mite add, but I am sodding fussy. 3 different estate agents have taken me to see the same grotty stinking apartment 3 times. This proves my point that estate agents do not listen to a word I say or maybe I am not making myself clear enough when I use the word MODERN? How does a stinking kitchen with cupboards hanging off, that looks like it has been there since the big bang constitute as modern? I am not asking for the world. I do not need my 3 bedroomed luxury duplex as the cleaning is going to kill me one day, but what I do need is something nice, if nice here in Marmaris actually exists outside of my 4 walls... So when I eventually get home, I seriously need to work on finding me and the Guc a new pad. Jeez I hate moving! At least Guc will enjoy not having his Mam around for a while. The sod is sure to be spoilt rotten with his Aunty Minglet and Uncle Mehmet. The thing is, Im sure he will abuse the situation as he always does when leaving him with others and tell them that I let him sleep in my bed and feed him 10 times a day. Sometimes he just cant stop himself from lying. I am going to try to blog whilst in Spain, but I have a feeling that the San Miguel's may stop me from doing this. That and the night caps of whiskey, vodka and brandy that my Dad will have me indulging in... But before I leave I need to fit in a lunch with Lotfi, a dinner with Joanne the minger, my roots need doing desperately, and I must get to the bloody bank. Seriously, why do I always leave everything to the last minute? Note to self: Whilst on holiday visiting the parents, remember that one is on an eternal stinking diet and one should not overindulge in Sunday Roasts and 3 course meals 3 times a day. The last time one did this one ended up a huge fatty and subsequently one is now addicted to diet pills. So that's me about done, Im off and away, so let me bid you a due for now. It actually feel's a bit like Christmas, I feel like the 'holidays are coming' Coke advert should be on but its not! Odd. At least its Halloween when I get back, and that dear readers is this vampire's favorite holiday! Ciao :) Viva Espana! |
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