Patsy and Eddie have done it again. Yes dear 5 readers of mine, after declaring that we would give our livers a rest this week, we decided that it was a ridiculous decision to make whilst still sober, so we popped open a beer and it was good night Vienna. How did we arrive at this sorrowful decision in the first place? Well, let me explain: The start of the week was quite a nice one. I did indeed go to the dentist's house and I did indeed have a jolly good night. The dentist is a bit like me, odd. I think thats why I like him. He is funny in a not so obvious way and he likes to get drunk. Good combination right? We didnt have a film date as previously mentioned, more of a beer and raki date. Its fair to say that we were both pretty intoxicated as when he got his guitar out, I quite happily sung along to Jumpin' Jack Flash at the top of my voice whilst hopping up and down in the middle of his lounge over and over and over again. Apparently there was snogging but as I dont recall that, does it mean it doesnt count? Anyway, he told me that I had gone to the loo and when I didnt come back, he came to check on me to find me fast asleep on his bathroom floor. Such a classy date eh? It was a hilariously funny night from start to finish (from what I remember) and a good statement to make here is I think I like my new friend. Wednesday didnt go well at all. Apart from the hangover from hell taking up most of my day, there was a crap load of work demanding my attention. The hangover followed me around for the entire day to the point of ridiculousness, so I took my self pitying butt up to bed early for a change. Joanne the minger decided to take her butt out for lots of vodka. Good minger. Thursday was brighter. I did make a slight cock up though. I received a text message from the MOT people saying that I was overdue for my MOT. As I hate going to these places alone, I talked Joanne the minger and her hangover into come with me. When we got there, I mentioned in passing that I hadnt even checked to see if the MOT was for Kastro (the car) or Betty (the scooter). Now please bear in mind here that being somewhat a spaz is not an illness yet it is contagious. I got the text message out and checked it properly. Off course it was for the dam scooter which had been so rudely stolen about 2 months ago. Duh... So nothing else for it but to go back to Joanne the mingers for a cuppa and a fag before heading back to work. The dentist was chatting away online and kind of invited himself over. I cant say that I was unhappy about that as even though he is a dentist, he is a funny one. We managed to drink again, laugh again and had me telling all my well kept secrets again. Why is it that when slightly intoxicated, I cant seem to keep my trap shut? And this time I do remember the snogging :) Another good night was had. This brought us up to Friday when me and Joanne the minger decided we were not going out this weekend and to stay off the pop. I went down to the beach to see Joanne and Maxine to find them on the Shandy's. This prompted me into ordering a shandy and thats where things may have started to go wrong. I only stayed for the one shandy but it gave me the taste for it again. When I got home, somehow me and Joanne the minger talked each other into going out. Again. It doesnt take much talking into in all fairness. We are both pretty weak when it comes to going out. So go out we did. We hit Cheers and stayed in Cheers all night. We only managed to fall out once that night, but when we do fall out, there is a bit of shouting, then screaming, then comes the hugging and the 'But I do really love you my minger'. Pretty normal for us mingers. The vodka in that sodding Cheers must be the cheap crap as I woke up on the floor half in and half out of the kitchen fully clothed once again with my handbag still on my shoulder. I had one of my shoes still on, but to this day I have not been able to locate the other, it is not in this house thats for sure... After peeling the top lid from the bottom, Joanne the minger called leting me know she was still a bit tipsy. I was too actually and it wasnt good. Food was needed immediately. After throwing on some clothes I went to get in the car to fetch the minger but no sodding car in sight. I hate it when that happens as I am not a fan of public transport at all. Anyway, as luck was on my side, whilst walking down the road in the general direction of the dolmus stop, there were 2 blokes on a scooter heading toward me. One hopped off and asked that if I was heading into town his friend would give me a life. So I jumped on the back and away we went to the mingers house. You have got to love the randomness of complete strangers in this country. After nearly coughing up a lung whilst Joanne the minger and Kelsey the minglet were in fits of laughter, we needed to go and locate Kastro who was found near Cheers. Then it was time to feed the hangover, and then came the bloody shandy's. The shandy's turned into beers and we ended up back at Joanne the mingers house on the balcony playing with the dog whilst trying not to stalk people on facebook. And, as always, I decided it was the best idea ever to text the ex and say hi. The bugger answered immediately and suggested a few drinks. Being rather intoxicated I thought what a good idea. Well, we laughed at least. His hair has gotten a bit gimp like, I dont fancy him at all anymore and I think I have got the stage where I can officially say I am over it and maybe we can be at least friends now. It could never ever be anything more than that as I just couldnt forgive him for going out with my ex friend, but I wont be forgiving her either so no problem there. But, like previously mentioned, we did laugh... And now I find myself still alive on Sunday. I dont know how I am still alive but I wont be drinking again anytime soon and thats a promise. My hangover has not been a beast but it is present enough for me to say that I dont want to see it again for some time. Joanne the minger has informed me that she didnt go to bed last night and as I couldnt be arsed to leave the house yet today, I have none of the ever so intriguing updates as yet. I dont think my impending doom will be too severe tonight as I am going out for a big fat curry and catch up with Jacki. Then I am putting myself on a sodding diet as I have eaten and drank far too much over the last week and its about time that I was a bit nicer to my body. I may even take Gucci out for a little walk tomorrow as long as the doom does not rear its ugly head. Yes, I have had a pretty good week so far and if this coming week is a good one I will need to bin my Adele tracks as she has not had to be played for a while :)
1 Comment
Liza
12/30/2011 09:58:06 am
"The vodka in that sodding Cheers must be the cheap crap as I woke up on the floor half in and half out of the kitchen fully clothed once again with my handbag still on my shoulder ...."
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